Martin, Young Clouseau? Un-Pink-able!
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Carl Tait (132)
251
Livewire (132)
252
Mr Hankey (131)
Sarcastic but basically nice.
Reviews by 'Livewire'
Current status of
Movie guru
with a total of
132
reviews published to date.
Order by
Film Name
Review Votes
Review Score
Chronological Order
Show
All
Ultrachrist! (2003)
Jesus Christ Super... Hero?
Jul 8, 2004
Unscored
Vote
(11)
Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace (1999)
No phantoms menace anyone.
Jul 30, 2004
Scored 3/5
Vote
(7)
Bruce Almighty (2003)
God hires a temp.
Aug 13, 2004
Scored 4/5
Vote
(5)
Malcolm X (1992)
X sparks the plot.
Aug 20, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
(4)
Shaun Of The Dead (2004)
Talking head: 'Behead undead!'.
Oct 14, 2004
Unscored
Vote
(4)
Air Force One (1997)
President is 'Ford Tough'.
Sep 26, 2004
Scored 2/5
Vote
(3)
Cloak & Dagger (1984)
Atari cartridge contains secrets.
Aug 1, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
(3)
Clown Murders, The (1976)
Candy sex scene. Ew.
Aug 19, 2004
Scored 2/5
Vote
(3)
Edward Scissorhands (1990)
Pinocchio armed and dangerous.
Sep 11, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
(3)
Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home (1986)
Space turd phones whales.
Oct 23, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
(3)
Big Meat Eater (1982)
Meat fuels alien ships.
Jul 8, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
(2)
Death To Smoochy (2002)
Disenfranchised kiddie icon vengeful.
Oct 23, 2004
Unscored
Vote
(2)
Face/Off (1997)
Faces swapped; protagonism shifts.
Aug 16, 2004
Scored 3/5
Vote
(2)
Highlander II: The Quickening (1991)
Immortals quicken. Fans sicken.
Aug 20, 2004
Scored 1/5
Vote
(2)
Hot Chick, The (2002)
Spoiled airhead experiences manhood.
Oct 8, 2004
Scored 4/5
Vote
(2)
Much Ado About Nothing (1993)
Keanu: sweatiest villain ever.
Aug 20, 2004
Scored 1/5
Vote
(2)
O Lucky Man! (1973)
Novice salesman schooled- repeatedly.
Aug 20, 2004
Scored 3/5
Vote
(2)
Princess Diaries, The (2001)
Savvy grandma mentors princess.
Mar 10, 2005
Unscored
Vote
(2)
Quiet Earth, The (1985)
All alone after apocalypse.
Aug 20, 2004
Scored 2/5
Vote
(2)
Redneck Zombies (1987)
Rancid moonshine breeds undead.
Jul 9, 2004
Scored 2/5
Vote
(2)
Whore (1991)
Disgruntled streetwalker sarcastically narrates.
Aug 20, 2004
Scored 4/5
Vote
(2)
Youngblood (1986)
Lowe: lipstick, mascara, blush.
Sep 26, 2004
Unscored
Vote
(2)
Akira (1988)
Teenager evolves; loses control.
Oct 19, 2004
Scored 4/5
Vote
(1)
Babylon 5: Thirdspace (1998)
Artifact opens another 'hyperspace'.
Aug 9, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Britannia Hospital (1982)
Surgeon beheads, reattaches, re-beheads.
Jul 10, 2004
Scored 1/5
Vote
(1)
Casper (1995)
Casper, you're no Beetlejuice.
Aug 10, 2004
Scored 3/5
Vote
(1)
City Hunter (1993)
Cartoon-based Chan flick.
Jul 8, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Deadliest Season, The (1977)
Hockey player's crosscheck fatal.
Jul 31, 2004
Scored 4/5
Vote
(1)
Doom Generation (1995)
Violent society eliminates pacifist.
Oct 23, 2004
Unscored
Vote
(1)
Dr Who And The Daleks (1965)
Homicidal fireplugs on wheels.
Sep 14, 2004
Scored 3/5
Vote
(1)
Dune (1984)
Worms poop delicious spice.
Oct 3, 2004
Scored 4/5
Vote
(1)
Fantastic Four, The (1994)
Corman's 'Four' total bore.
Mar 10, 2005
Scored 1/5
Vote
(1)
Fearless (1993)
Crash cures fear, allergies.
Sep 12, 2004
Unscored
Vote
(1)
Fortress (1992)
Procreating twice means jail.
Sep 12, 2004
Unscored
Vote
(1)
Four Rooms (1995)
Witches. Brats. Threesome. Gamblers.
Aug 5, 2004
Scored 2/5
Vote
(1)
From Dusk Till Dawn (1996)
Holy water super soakers.
Aug 19, 2004
Scored 2/5
Vote
(1)
Hideaway (1995)
Goldblum, killer telepathically linked.
Sep 7, 2004
Unscored
Vote
(1)
High Strung (1994)
Oedekerk dies from complaining.
Jul 11, 2004
Scored 4/5
Vote
(1)
Hotshot (1986)
P�l� trains soccer brat.
Jul 11, 2004
Scored 3/5
Vote
(1)
Jingle All The Way (1996)
Rival dads hunt toy.
Aug 20, 2004
Scored 4/5
Vote
(1)
Knight Moves (1992)
Killer frames chess master.
Sep 17, 2004
Scored 3/5
Vote
(1)
Knute Rockne All American (1940)
Immigrant becomes football legend.
Oct 10, 2004
Scored 4/5
Vote
(1)
Kuffs (1992)
Slater inherits police department.
Jul 11, 2004
Scored 4/5
Vote
(1)
Liquid Sky (1982)
Aliens eat sex hormones.
Jul 11, 2004
Scored 3/5
Vote
(1)
Microwave Massacre (1983)
Microwave makes cannibalism popular.
Jul 27, 2004
Scored 3/5
Vote
(1)
My Fellow Americans (1996)
Grumpy Old Ex-Presidents.
Aug 20, 2004
Scored 4/5
Vote
(1)
Nicholas And Alexandra (1971)
Look 'Who' plays Rasputin.
Aug 23, 2004
Scored 3/5
Vote
(1)
Party, The (1968)
Clouseau clone invades soiree.
Aug 20, 2004
Scored 4/5
Vote
(1)
Raise The Red Lantern (1991)
Obedience merits foot massage.
Aug 22, 2004
Scored 4/5
Vote
(1)
Reflecting Skin, The (1990)
Boy's disgraced father immolates.
Sep 17, 2004
Scored 3/5
Vote
(1)
Spider-Man 2 (2004)
Grievous bodily arms charged.
Jul 30, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Star Trek: Nemesis (2002)
Romulans' slaves successfully revolt.
Aug 31, 2004
Scored 4/5
Vote
(1)
Truman Show, The (1998)
Carrey discover's life's 'backstage'.
Aug 17, 2004
Scored 4/5
Vote
(1)
Twin Warriors (1993)
Balance beats bad brother.
Jul 22, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
What Dreams May Come (1998)
Risking damnation for wife.
Sep 26, 2004
Unscored
Vote
(1)
Withnail & I (1987)
Starving actors' vacation disaster.
Oct 19, 2004
Unscored
Vote
(1)
You Better Watch Out (1980)
Impostor Santa punishes brats.
Jul 9, 2004
Scored 3/5
Vote
(1)
6th Day, The (2000)
Clone bigot gets cloned.
Sep 26, 2004
Scored 3/5
Vote
At Play In The Fields Of The Lord (1991)
Kathy Bates naked, filthy.
Sep 14, 2004
Scored 3/5
Vote
Babylon 5: A Call To Arms (1999)
Shadows' final assault: Earth.
Jul 30, 2004
Scored 4/5
Vote
Babylon 5: In The Beginning (1998)
Minbari decimate Earth fleet.
Aug 9, 2004
Scored 4/5
Vote
Babylon 5: The Gathering (1993)
Enigmatic ambassador's attacker hunted.
Jul 29, 2004
Scored 4/5
Vote
Babylon 5: The Legend Of The Rangers: To Live And Die In Starlight (2002)
Weightless ninja destroys ships.
Apr 6, 2005
Unscored
Vote
Babylon 5: The River Of Souls (1998)
Aliens bottle moribund humans.
Jul 30, 2004
Scored 3/5
Vote
Big Trouble (2002)
Bowler, Tick: Miami cops.
Oct 23, 2004
Unscored
Vote
Blow (2001)
Director overdosed and died.
Oct 3, 2004
Unscored
Vote
Catch Me If You Can (2002)
Fraudster flies free; flees.
Sep 24, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
Clean Slate (1994)
Detective loses identity daily.
Mar 7, 2005
Scored 3/5
Vote
Closet Land (1991)
One-scene torture drama.
Sep 12, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
Constantine (2005)
Punk exorcist prevents Antichrist.
Mar 31, 2005
Scored 4/5
Vote
Dangerous Brothers Present: World Of Danger (1986)
Mayall, Edmondson obnoxious daredevils.
Sep 28, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
Daredevil (2003)
Rooftop gymnast uses sonar.
Aug 12, 2004
Scored 2/5
Vote
Dear God (1996)
Posties bring prayers true.
Sep 12, 2004
Unscored
Vote
Dutch (1991)
Al Bundy becomes stepdad.
Jul 8, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
Eraser (1996)
X-ray rail guns. Wicked!
Sep 12, 2004
Unscored
Vote
Ewoks: The Battle For Endor (1985)
Orphan rescued by Muppets.
Sep 12, 2004
Unscored
Vote
Exit To Eden (1994)
Psychiatrist makes prudes fornicate.
Mar 7, 2005
Scored 4/5
Vote
Far And Away (1992)
Farmer, heiress leave Ireland.
Oct 19, 2004
Unscored
Vote
Final Approach (1991)
Psychiatrist interviews amnesiac pilot.
Jul 26, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
Firehead (1991)
Defective Russian cyborg defects.
Jul 26, 2004
Scored 1/5
Vote
Frankenhooker (1990)
Distraught nerd reassembles fiancee.
Aug 5, 2004
Scored 4/5
Vote
G.I. Joe: The Movie (1987)
Cobra Commander slithers away.
Sep 4, 2004
Scored 2/5
Vote
Hard Eight (1996)
Old gambler mentors loser.
Mar 6, 2005
Scored 5/5
Vote
Heavy Metal (1981)
Pre-anime adult cartoons.
Sep 17, 2004
Scored 3/5
Vote
Hell Comes To Frogtown (1987)
Roddy battles post-apocalyptic frogmen.
Jul 8, 2004
Scored 4/5
Vote
Hellbound: Hellraiser II (1988)
Doctor obliterates weakling cenobites.
Mar 28, 2005
Unscored
Vote
Hellraiser (1987)
Puzzle bridges Hell, earth.
Sep 14, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
Hellraiser III: Hell On Earth (1992)
Crappiest cenobites ever. Bartender?!
Mar 28, 2005
Unscored
Vote
High Spirits (1988)
O'Toole creates haunted castle.
Jul 23, 2004
Scored 3/5
Vote
Highlander (1986)
Immortal humans instinctively duel.
Sep 17, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
House Arrest (1996)
Kids kidnap squabbling parents.
Jul 11, 2004
Scored 3/5
Vote
Hunt For Red October, The (1990)
Baldwin tracks renegade sub.
Jul 22, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
I, Robot (2004)
Inventor murdereded by robot?
Aug 2, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
Jungleground (1995)
Criminal city hunts Roddy.
Jul 11, 2004
Scored 3/5
Vote
K-PAX (2001)
Prot protects Porter's perspicacity.
Jan 12, 2005
Unscored
Vote
Last Prostitute, The (1991)
Wheaton befriends retired hooker.
Jul 11, 2004
Scored 2/5
Vote
Loose Cannons (1990)
Aykroyd, Hackman; buddy cops.
Jul 8, 2004
Scored 4/5
Vote
Masala (1991)
Surreal Indo-Canadian family adventures.
Jul 11, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
Men Of Respect (1990)
Mafioso's missus machinates murder.
Sep 17, 2004
Scored 3/5
Vote
Miller's Crossing (1990)
Byrne regrets cancelling execution.
Sep 26, 2004
Unscored
Vote
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