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86
aahaa, muahaha (948)
87
tortoise (912)
88
Dante (899)
Still reviewing, but slowly.
Reviews by 'tortoise'
Current status of
Movie star
with a total of
912
reviews published to date.
Order by
Film Name
Review Votes
Review Score
Chronological Order
Show
All
Alien (1979)
Hurt's eating for two.
Sep 5, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(12)
Aliens (1986)
Battle of all mothers.
Aug 29, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(24)
Am�lie (2001)
Belle fille rendezvous.
Jan 3, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
(5)
Am�lie (2001)
Waitress counts 15 orgasms.
Mar 15, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
(3)
Back To The Future (1985)
DeLorean gets flat battery.
Apr 3, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(3)
Batman Begins (2005)
Policeman borrows vigilante's car.
Nov 21, 2005
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Batman Begins (2005)
Bale calls for backup.
Nov 25, 2005
Scored 5/5
Vote
Bourne Ultimatum, The (2007)
Bourne comes full circle.
Oct 9, 2007
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Bourne Ultimatum, The (2007)
Bourne's parking truly sucks.
Oct 9, 2007
Scored 5/5
Vote
(2)
Bourne Ultimatum, The (2007)
Hack tracked, hacked, whacked.
Nov 30, 2007
Scored 5/5
Vote
Casino Royale (2006)
Vesper has no 'tell'.
Mar 29, 2007
Scored 5/5
Vote
(3)
Casino Royale (2006)
Bond's parking sucks.
Mar 29, 2007
Scored 5/5
Vote
(4)
Chicken Run (2000)
Magnificent hen, flying machine.
Apr 3, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(19)
Chicken Run (2000)
The Bantam Menace.
Jul 23, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
(21)
Dead Man Walking (1995)
Nun becomes Penn pal.
Aug 24, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(21)
Dish, The (2000)
American national anthem... improved.
Apr 3, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(7)
Fish Called Wanda, A (1988)
Permed Palin petrifies pooches.
Jun 19, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(5)
Fish Called Wanda, A (1988)
McCain's up Palin's nose.
Nov 19, 2008
Scored 5/5
Vote
(2)
GoldenEye (1995)
Typical bloody BMW driver.
Mar 28, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(6)
GoldenEye (1995)
Xenia: 'Super Thighs, Me!'.
Mar 22, 2007
Scored 5/5
Vote
(10)
Gone Nutty (2002)
Skydiving squirrel suffers setback.
Jun 12, 2005
Scored 5/5
Vote
(3)
Gone Nutty (2002)
Computer animation: acorn risk.
Jun 12, 2005
Scored 5/5
Vote
Gone Nutty (2002)
Scrat in the hat.
Jun 12, 2005
Scored 5/5
Vote
Green Mile, The (1999)
Executioner sentenced to life.
Aug 19, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(5)
Hangover, The (2009)
Tooth and dare.
Jun 9, 2010
Scored 5/5
Vote
Highlander (1986)
Longevity affects Scotsman's accent.
Sep 3, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(8)
Hotel Rwanda (2004)
Abandon family? Okonedo that!
Jul 4, 2006
Scored 5/5
Vote
(7)
Hotel Rwanda (2004)
Concierge under siege.
Jul 4, 2006
Scored 5/5
Vote
Ideal Husband, An (1999)
Minnie tames Wilde bachelor.
May 11, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
(3)
Incredibles, The (2004)
Junior athlete throws race.
Apr 28, 2005
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Jerk, The (1979)
Martin picks out thermos.
Jun 18, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
King's Speech, The (2010)
Bertie's confidence royally fucked!
Feb 1, 2011
Scored 5/5
Vote
King's Speech, The (2010)
Monarch. Logue. Monologue.
Feb 1, 2011
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Kite Runner, The (2007)
Amir regrets buggering off.
May 25, 2011
Scored 5/5
Vote
Lord Of The Rings: The Fellowship Of The Ring, The (2001)
Hard hobbit to break.
Apr 8, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(23)
Lord Of The Rings: The Return Of The King, The (2003)
Fro' versus the volcano.
Jan 4, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
(18)
Lord Of The Rings: The Return Of The King, The (2003)
Pipe smokers' Gondor moment.
Jan 4, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
(6)
Lord Of The Rings: The Return Of The King, The (2003)
Fight of the Gondor.
Jan 4, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
(13)
Lord Of The Rings: The Return Of The King, The (2003)
Gondor's steward gets fired.
Jan 15, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
(17)
Lord Of The Rings: The Return Of The King, The (2003)
Christopher Lee's part's cut.
Jun 18, 2005
Scored 5/5
Vote
(12)
Man With Two Brains, The (1983)
Martin seeks, ignores 'sign'.
Jan 1, 2006
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Man With Two Brains, The (1983)
Homicide? Hooker doesn't mind.
Sep 14, 2005
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Man With Two Brains, The (1983)
Child's haematoma diagnosis dissed.
Feb 16, 2006
Scored 5/5
Vote
Man With Two Brains, The (1983)
Necessiter, murder 'n' invention.
Aug 24, 2008
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Memento (2000)
Tattootal recall.
Jan 5, 2008
Scored 5/5
Vote
(9)
Moulin Rouge! (2001)
Parisian bohemians discover karaoke.
Jun 26, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(3)
Name Of The Rose, The (1986)
Connery expects Spanish inquisition.
Jan 13, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
(11)
Nanny McPhee (2005)
Firth fancies housekeeper, again.
Nov 13, 2005
Scored 5/5
Vote
(2)
Nanny McPhee (2005)
Daughter impersonated by donkey.
Nov 19, 2005
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Nanny McPhee (2005)
Myopia, She Wrote.
Nov 26, 2005
Scored 5/5
Vote
(3)
O Brother, Where Art Thou? (2000)
Reworked Odyssey? Hmmm... tenuous.
Apr 3, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Parole Officer, The (2001)
Crime, corrupt cops, crisps.
Feb 19, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(2)
Pianist, The (2002)
Chopin for food.
Apr 28, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
(25)
Prestige, The (2006)
Conjurer's slight of hand.
Sep 17, 2010
Scored 5/5
Vote
Prestige, The (2006)
Tesla: undocumented cloning pioneer.
Sep 17, 2010
Scored 5/5
Vote
Prestige, The (2006)
Rival magicians swap notebooks.
Sep 17, 2010
Scored 5/5
Vote
Prestige, The (2006)
Illusionist's trial: double jeopardy.
Sep 17, 2010
Scored 5/5
Vote
Prestige, The (2006)
Spare Bale spared jail.
Sep 17, 2010
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Prince Of Egypt, The (1998)
Basket case gets religion.
May 19, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(2)
Raiders Of The Lost Ark (1981)
Nazis' transmitter: Jewish technology.
Jun 10, 2008
Scored 5/5
Vote
Schindler's List (1993)
Redcoat fired by camp.
Oct 29, 2010
Scored 5/5
Vote
Schindler's List (1993)
Spielberg's Oskar no-Shoah.
Oct 29, 2010
Scored 5/5
Vote
Shanghai Noon (2000)
East meets Wild West.
Feb 20, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(3)
Shrek (2001)
Dragon kisses ogre's ass.
Jun 21, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(4)
Shrek 2 (2004)
Justin is Diaz's pinup.
Nov 6, 2005
Scored 5/5
Vote
(2)
Shrek 2 (2004)
Reformed ogre: Gordon Brown?!
Nov 8, 2005
Scored 5/5
Vote
(2)
Sixth Sense, The (1999)
Bruce revisits old haunts.
Apr 2, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(29)
Slumdog Millionaire (2008)
Jamal: fixed it?
Nov 13, 2011
Scored 5/5
Vote
Social Network, The (2010)
Social networker networks antisocially.
Jul 28, 2011
Scored 5/5
Vote
Star Trek (2009)
Spock breaches Prime Directive.
May 21, 2009
Scored 5/5
Vote
Star Trek (2009)
Spooked Kirk irks Spock.
May 21, 2009
Scored 5/5
Vote
Star Trek (2009)
Space: the initial frontier.
May 21, 2009
Scored 5/5
Vote
(2)
Star Trek (2009)
Kirk's a born spacefarer.
May 21, 2009
Scored 5/5
Vote
Star Trek (2009)
Sarek: Cross. Spock: furious.
Nov 2, 2009
Scored 5/5
Vote
Star Trek II: The Wrath Of Khan (1982)
Scotty plays the bagpipes.
Mar 27, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country (1991)
Spock slaps Vulcan slapper.
Mar 27, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country (1991)
Plummer takes the piss.
Mar 27, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
Star Trek: First Contact (1996)
Picard fights in vest.
Mar 26, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
Star Trek: First Contact (1996)
Data's loyalty- skin-deep.
Mar 26, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(9)
Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge Of The Sith (2005)
Turn Of The Jedi.
Jun 23, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
(55)
Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge Of The Sith (2005)
Dark Side 'suits' Anakin.
Jul 13, 2004
Scored 5/5
Vote
(23)
Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge Of The Sith (2005)
Twin son's for Tattooine.
May 23, 2005
Scored 5/5
Vote
(11)
Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge Of The Sith (2005)
McGregor falls off unicycle.
Jun 6, 2005
Scored 5/5
Vote
(5)
Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge Of The Sith (2005)
Christopher Lee's parts cut.
Jun 9, 2005
Scored 5/5
Vote
(21)
Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge Of The Sith (2005)
Padme misses ultrasound appointment.
Jan 8, 2006
Scored 5/5
Vote
(7)
Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge Of The Sith (2005)
Luke. Dad: no hands!
Jan 23, 2006
Scored 5/5
Vote
(16)
Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge Of The Sith (2005)
Chosen one forced off-balance.
Feb 1, 2006
Scored 5/5
Vote
(8)
Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge Of The Sith (2005)
Jedi daycare facility closed.
Jan 8, 2006
Scored 5/5
Vote
(16)
Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge Of The Sith (2005)
Yoda launches adoption agency.
Jan 8, 2006
Scored 5/5
Vote
(11)
Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge Of The Sith (2005)
Chancellor exercises new powers.
Jan 16, 2006
Scored 5/5
Vote
(5)
Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge Of The Sith (2005)
Count can't count fingers.
Jan 16, 2006
Scored 5/5
Vote
(9)
Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge Of The Sith (2005)
Uninhibited Anakin gets legless.
Feb 1, 2006
Scored 5/5
Vote
(7)
Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge Of The Sith (2005)
Count Dooku-pitated.
Jan 16, 2006
Scored 5/5
Vote
(4)
Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge Of The Sith (2005)
No Vader treat milady.
Jun 1, 2006
Scored 5/5
Vote
(11)
Stardust (2007)
Gervais finally stops wittering.
Jul 23, 2010
Scored 5/5
Vote
Strictly Ballroom (1992)
Last tango in Prahran.
Jul 2, 2005
Scored 5/5
Vote
(3)
Tailor Of Panama, The (2001)
Brosnan's other spy role.
Jun 6, 2003
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Usual Suspects, The (1995)
Keyser 'n' the ignition.
Jul 6, 2008
Scored 5/5
Vote
Very Long Engagement, A (2004)
Fianc� ditched, not jilted.
Feb 4, 2009
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Very Long Engagement, A (2004)
Tatou's prospects rather iffy.
Jan 12, 2009
Scored 5/5
Vote
(1)
Page Range
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